Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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