she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Randomize
