Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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