What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
