Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I cut my penus on the lid.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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