whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Less talking, more tequila
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
This is my gift to your gina
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Randomize
