Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Randomize