I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Randomize