Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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