I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
that may or may not have been my penis.
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