Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
