youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
