I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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