Already got asked if we're dating
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
