a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
