I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Randomize
