I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
found the other keg... it's in the tree
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
why is half of my head shaved?
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
