I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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