just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Holy sore nipples Batman
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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