I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
