3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
