You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
