I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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