i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
