i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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