So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
Randomize
