I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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