We're like a lot better than the average bears
Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Dicks are not precious.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
