Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Randomize
