last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You need a sexual gate keeper
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Randomize
