I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
