zippers are such a cool invention
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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