is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Don't tell me you're on acid again
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
