I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
