In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
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