The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Will exercising make me less horny?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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