he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Randomize
