Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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