The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize