tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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