I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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