trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
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