it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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