East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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