Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
