We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
