It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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