You're completely useless in the revolution.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
