Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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