what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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