Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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